More Discussions in a Sports Bar
Once again, it’s been a while since I visited my neighborhood sports bar.
Frankly, I’m not a great fan of bars and nightclubs in general, but as all of you loyal readers probably remember, this particular bar is more attractive than most – and that is mainly because Jenny, the really cute waitress works there.
It was another hot and muggy, early summer day, as I shut down the air conditioning and then the engine of my car, hoping that the inside of the bar would be nice and cool.
The ever-present, black-clad greeters as usual opened the door for me and since I didn’t remember a single one of then, how could I expect any of them to remember me? In any case, had to go through the familiar ritual of telling them to sit me in a booth in the left-hand, smoking area of the bar. The greeter girl, who couldn’t have been more than 18, walked me over to the booth, featuring photos of Jackie Gleason playing golf and a totally unfamiliar (but probably deemed as important) wide photo of some baseball game. I looked around. There were all kinds of games going on the many large screen TV sets. Baseball, golf, a NASCAR race and the usual array of sports commentators blabbing about whatever sports commentators usually blab about. A couple of sets were tuned into some news reports and at least one had a large Doppler radar image of an approaching line of storms. Not that many people. A few at the bar, being much too loud and a few more in the booths and at the high tables, extending the bar area.
As I laid out my tobacco pouch, papers, the cigarette machine and the brass Zippo lighter on the table, I was thinking whether Jenny was working that day. After another quick look around the establishment I got busy rolling myself a cigarette, mindful of the fact that pretty soon smoking would be banned even in bars. All of a sudden, out of the corner of my eye I noticed a quick movement and the unmistakable sound of a beer mug being planted on my table. As I looked up, Jenny’s smiling face was looking down at me. “What do I have to do for you to come around more often?” she asked. Before I could answer, she added:” Don’t you like me anymore?” as she sat across from me in the booth. I smiled, not only because of what she said, but also because she looked better than ever. Did something to her blond hair. What was it? We guys don’t really pay that much attention to hairdos and such, but this time I was quick to pick up the change – she curled the hair a bit and that really went well not only with her very pretty face, super-duper body, but also with her personality. I extended my left hand to touch hers. Immediately, she noticed that I had a new watch. “Hey! Did you come into some money? That watch is not only big and great looking, but I happen to know that it costs a mint.” She said. To this point I haven’t said a word yet. Just stroked her hand, looked into her blue eyes, moved my foot towards hers and smiled. She kept her smile and now I could see her eyes starting to smile as well. Things were just fine with the world.
“I hope that you will be able to manage to join me, like you did before” I said. I felt that she relaxed all of a sudden and I could see that certain softness creep into her eyes. “ I think I can, but let me just double check” she said, as she got up from her seat.
I watched her walk towards the back of the bar. The shapely legs were almost impossible to criticize.
Dreaming a bit, I took a swig of my beer. It sure tasted like Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, which I usually had in this place. She remembered even that. Got busy finishing my cigarette. Rolled it, licked the edge of the paper. Rolled into the machine again and popped it out. Immediately started making a second one for Jenny, but before I even sprinkled the tobacco between the rollers, Jenny was back, with her own beer and her own pouch of tobacco. “I learned to roll ‘em like a cowboy” she said, “you know, taming the bronco with one hand and rolling the smoke with the other”. I already knew that her manual coordination was good, but her newly acquired rolling skill – which I haven’t been able to master too well – impressed me. “Hope you’re not planning to tame me” I said, “ I don’t do too well being tamed one-handed by a cowgirl”. “Don’t you worry, baby,” she said, “I know that I need both hands to handle you”. I wish I took a picture of the mischievous smile she had on as she was saying that. It said it all and more.
“Do you want the usual?” asked Jenny. I nodded. “ That’s perfect as I already ordered it for you in the kitchen”. I couldn’t stop myself from laughing out loud, attracting a surprised stare from a couple of sports fans guzzling beer at the bar. I wasn’t sure what they were watching and I didn’t care. In any case, soon enough they went back to staring at their boob tube of choice and I admired Jenny some more. “ I like that look you got” she said. “ I wish I could see it more often, but you only come here every few months…” That did sound like another invitation – one that I wasn’t about to refuse.
Somebody called her from the back and Jenny excused herself, saying that my mushroom burger, with bacon and a fried egg on top was ready.
I decided that I had just enough time to finish my smoke before she came back and looked at that the golfing photo of Gleason on the wall. Golf, like pool and bowling is definitely an activity – I stopped calling any of them “sports” many years ago – good for people in less than good physical shape, I thought.
Just as I took my eyes of chubby Jackie, Jenny placed a large plate with the open burger – the beef patty and the fried egg on one half, lettuce, a too red and fresh-looking not to have been gassed tomato slice and onions on the other. A load of French fries and two pickle slices filled the rest of the plate. Jenny also brought some Ball Park mustard and another Sierra Nevada. This looked like a really big meal. I was just hoping that I wouldn’t start looking like Jackie Gleason any time soon. And my desert was staring me in the face, smiling from across the booth. Life was good!
As I started pouring ketchup and mustard and assembling the burger, Jenny started to skillfully roll her cigarette, without the aid of the rolling machine. “You have to teach me how to do that,” I said, taking the first yummy bite. “Not a problem, if we don’t have time to practice tonight” she winked, as she took a swig of her Sapporo beer “ I will teach you next time.”
The burger was good – well done, as always – and so was the beer.
Didn’t feel like practicing rolling the cowboy way just yet and before I even managed to reach for my pouch and rolling machine, Jenny’s slim hand was holding a ready smoke for me. “That’s what I call full service” I smiled. “You know that we aim to please,” she said. I flicked my Zippo, applied the flame to the tip and inhaled deeply. Boy! Did that feel good!
“By the way, how do you feel about the ban on smoking in bars that’s coming up,” I asked. “And how about banning smoking in prisons?” Jenny smiled and said, “I think that this might be particularly important on death row. We got to keep them healthy, so we can fry them, or inject them with the poisons”. That brought a chuckle from me and the usual desires started cursing through my veins. “What time are you getting off today”, I asked. She looked me straight in the eye and said, “ I already asked my boss. There are not too many people today and I can leave anytime I want.
Did I mention before that life was good?
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If you enjoyed this episode, take a look at our previous “Sports Bar” posts:
A Democratic Debate in a Sports Bar
More Political Discussions in a Sports Bar
Politics in a Sports Bar – Encore
Olympic Discussion in a Sports Bar
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